A Seat For You.

If you asked me one year ago, "Where do you see yourself in the next year?", I would probably have answered something like "In a bigger home, with a bigger backyard and still homeschooling my kids.". Nothing crazy, just the basic, "white picket fence, American dream" (and boy is that a scam! Haha.) But if I'm honest, if I got asked that question even just in the last few months, I still would not have given the answer of where God actually has placed me. Where I actually am, at this moment, in this season. You see, nobody talks about first generations when it comes to being the FIRST generation in your family to do something totally different. Something that might seeem crazy, unhinged, totally "out of the norm" to many people. And when you don't have the support from the ones who claim to love and care for you the most, it makes you begin to doubt if you really are making the right choice. You start to question if the decison you made was really from the Lord. Whether you are walking in obedience or simply stepping out of emotion and not faith. But the more something in your life just doesn't make sense, the more you are able to see God has had His hand upon that very situation the whole, entire, time. When I first brought up to my husband that it was on my heart to homeschool our children, it was an instant, "No.". I was confused. Why would the Lord put this on my heart just for my own husband to not support it and turn it down as fast as a kid can scarf down a bag of candy!! It just made no sense to me. I remember bringing it up time and time again, but the more I brought it up, the more he began to resent the whole idea of that ever happening. Then one day, I heard God whisper to me, "Be patient. STOP. Pray for the situation instead. Pray for your husband's heart." And if you know me, I can be patient in so many things, with so many other people, but asking me to be patient with my husband and keeping my mouth shut during that time was nearly impossible for me (but thank God with Chirst, NOTHING is impossible!). Haha. Anyways, as hard as that was for me, the Lord knew the desires of my heart. He already knew exactly what would happen, when it would happen and how it would happen. I just simply needed to "Be Still.". Fast forward a few weeks later, one night we were talking and he brought up homeschooling! Can you believe it?! Yeah, me either! Ha! My own husband came to me and said "I think you're right about this homeschool thing, (because are we ever wrong ladies?!...JK.) but what would it look like?". And keep in mind, neither my husband nor myself were homeschooled. We went to public school and it showed! Big time. Haha. When I realized that he was on board, I almost began to freak out a bit. I started questioning if I was making the right choice, I began to feel as if I wasn't good enough or qualified to homeschool our kids. Worry consumed me and I honestly found myself second guessing the whole thing! You see, the enemy knows exactly how to distract us and what lies to fill our minds with that we might start to believe. There is a quote I heard from a very sweet friend of mine years ago and it is still a life motto, she said, "Don't believe everything you think." and I will NEVER forget those five words. When we are not in the Word, when we allow ourselves to become distracted by the thoughts and lies the enemy uses, we can lose heart. But when we hold captive those thoughts, when we cast down those lies and replace them with God's promises and truths, the scales are lifted and we see those fiery darts for what they really are! Homeschool was about to change our lives forever. Our family had NO idea just how much. It was truly bigger than any of us could have imagined. The Lord knew it, but so did satan. And he was trying to make sure I did not walk in obedience to the Lord because even he knew how this one decision was going to BUILD THE KINGDOM! I had found a free co-op called The Gathering Place where we had made so many friends and felt so welcomed. Like that was where we belonged. The kids thrived and everything started to change. Our home began to change. We began to grow closer as a family. Don't be fooled though, we had our challenges, we experienced trials and warfare, no doubt!! But through all of what we endured, we came through even stronger. A social group formed from the co-op called GPS, Gathering Place Social. And what was about to unfold, I wouldn't have even believed. Why I said at the beginning, "I still would not have given the answer of where God actually has placed me. Where I actually am at this moment in this season.". To think I would be homeschooling my kids one day was never something I really thought of until literally a few months before it actually happened. But what I NEVER expected was to find the community that God has woven together through GPS. This homeschoool journey was hard to say the least. It came with it's challenges and there were many days where I was ready to throw in the towel. Let me just tell you, I AM SO GLAD I DIDN'T! Each person has played such a vital role in our family's lives and our journey. So much so that friendships were made and opportunities that only our God could make happen, happened. Which brings me to today. Writing a blog for CommUNITY Table. The non profit I had NO idea I would help start, but that God knew about since the beginning. CommUNITY Table is so much more than an organization though. It's a living testament of what God can do when we allow Him to work and we choose to walk in obedience, TRUSTING that His plans are ALWAYS BETTER. CommUNITY Table is a group of imperfect people, sinners who miss the mark every day, but who have chosen to walk freely in the forgiveness of Jesus Christ ao that we can BRING PEOPLE TO THE TABLE! We don't have it all figured out. We are all parents who simply saw the need to bring resources to our community, to our neighbors around us but most importantly to provide a seat for those who need one.

With all that said, Judas ate too. Although Jesus knew exactly what would happen, even though He knew Judas would betray Him, Jesus had a seat at the table for him. We are called to love our enemies, we are called to love our neighbors. And I don't know about you, but I am ready to make Heaven crowded. I am ready to place as many seats as we need to, right here at CommUNITY Table.